Phan Male

Hello again, boys and girls.

We have a special treat for you this evening. Actually, it's more a treat for me, but hey, at least one of us is happy. I'm bringing back one of my all-time favorite columns -- Reader Mail.

Basically, in the Reader Mail column, I respond to the lovely letters and notes I receive each week. I answer questions (primarily concerning the whereabouts of my head in relation to my backside), offer tips (usually spelling, although we have given out medical advice a few times) and generally just converse with the loyal readers (and by "loyal," I mean guys who read once and write bad things).

So, here we go.

Barrett, a recent Ole Miss grad, from Montgomery

As a native of Montgomery and a recent graduate of Ole Miss, I am quite disappointed with your juvenile, baseless, and thoughtless attack on my alma mater for seemingly no reason other than to make your weekly word count.

Answer: First, congrats on the recent degree. I'm sure one from Ole Miss is almost as good as one from a real school. (I'm joking. It's a fine institution.)
As for the complaint, I'll give you juvenile. It's what I do. But "baseless" and "thoughtless"? Your mascot is going to be a pop-eyed crawfish. That's base. And I recounted Orgeron and the KKK. That's thought.


Caroline, a current Ole Miss student, from Montgomery

A recent column by Josh Moon run March 1 in regard to Ole Miss’ mascot selection contained numerous fallacies.
As a lifetime Montgomery native and current Ole Miss student, I can say firsthand that it is not up for serious contemplation. Moon also wrote that “that the students reportedly want it to happen is enough.” The Daily Mississippian, the student newspaper of Ole Miss, clearly stated in a direct quote from the group’s founders that its creation was a joke. Admiral Ackbar is not a viable candidate for mascot, and will not be. The students are backing it for a laugh, but are not behind it as a real mascot.
I was disappointed to see such an error-riddled argument run in the Advertiser. I would expect any columnist to research the situation first, and to leave irrelevant information (the KKK, how ‘pompous’ the students are) out of it.

Answer: Here's a tip: When you use terms such as "numerous fallacies" and "error-riddled," you sort of lead people to believe that you have found more than one fallacy or error. So, when you then spend three paragraphs detailing the one error you believe you've found and never offer a second, you confuse people.
And it's especially confusing when even your one complaint makes no sense. I don't care why Admiral Ackbar is winning. I don't care who started it. I don't care why they started it. I don't care that he'll never be the official mascot. I thought I made that clear by stating in the column that "I don't care ..."
What I do care about is an SEC institution acting as if it belongs in C-USA.



Glenna, a Miss. St. grad, from Prattville

I don't normally read your column, and now that I've read your views in Monday's edition, I won't read it again.
How sad that you think the whole world revolves around sports teams from AL. You can have Ole Miss and their new mascot. But why drag Miss State into the mix? What did we ever do to you? Oh wait - maybe it's because Miss State has the chance to be the next SEC basketball champions!

Answer: Look at Glenna -- comes out of MSU and still knows how to use e-mail and the Internet. Good for you.
To answer your question, MSU forced me to ride through a barren countryside to watch bad football as thousands of cowbells clanged. And while the whole world doesn't revolve around teams from Alabama, the world of college football certainly revolved around one team from Alabama this year.
I look forward to hearing from you next week.


Leonard from Part Unknown

All right suck it up already and be a man not another sore American loser. The loss to the Canadian women in Olympic Hockey was another typical American response, can’t beat them so fabricate some dirt to show your discontent. If you can’t play the game then why enter to become a loser, the last thing we need to hear is your whining.

Answer: Enjoy that hockey medal. We'll enjoy the medals from all the other sports.


Ken in Nashville

Great article about kicking Ole Miss out of the SEC. Very Objective. I’m glad to know that there is still credible journalism out there. For a while there, I was worried that newspapers would just let anyone with a typewriter and an opinion (dumb or not) write articles- especially the Montgomery Adviser. I’m surprised that the Montgomery Adviser can afford a writer as well-written as you. You are obviously on your way up the “newspaper corporate ladder.” In no time I expect to see your comments, blogs, and editorials in the Crenshaw Gazzette or Dale Daily Journal. I see big things for you as a journalist. Keep sharing your opinion. Most people are too smart not to do so. Not you my friend. You are on your way up. The 34 people that read your article/paper should really know how lucky they are.

Answer: This, boys and girls, is how you write a scathing response. Note the sarcasm, the backhanded digs and the subtle humor. This is writing a nasty letter while also maintaining perspective. Well done, Ken. Although, the Dale Daily Journal is still a bit out of reach at this point.


That's all for this edition.